Rude Relish

     You have your hot dog, and you just finish putting the ketchup and mustard on.  Then (assuming you want pickle material on your food) you grab the relish bottle.  But it's nearly empty, with barely any left in the bottom.  That's a problem too, that it's all in the bottom, not at the lid.  To combat this problem, you begin trying various methods to get the remaining relish to the lid where you can access it (I'll leave this to your imagination).  Then other people around you start giving you funny looks, but thankfully you manage to get a satisfactory amount of the green stuff to the lid.  You open the lid and turn the bottle to your hot dog and give it a little coaxing to get out.  All that comes out is some watery liquid that you'd never drink under any circumstances, soaking up nicely in your once dry bun.  With a minute amount of frustration, you take the lid off completely to see if the relish will come out.  It doesn't.  So you begin to throttle the bottle, and all of the relish plops out on one spot.  All you have to do now is spread it out across the bun.

     I don't know the moral to this story, so if anybody knows, please let me know!